Sitting on the Edge of a Dream

Kay is a 40 year old woman who has been married to her husband, Dave, for 15 years. Her life has been filled with pain and many disappointments over the years.

So, she escapes her reality by reminiscing on the good times with her high school sweetheart, Reginald.

Kay gets hurt in a very bad car accident, and Reginald comes back into her life to see about her. Kay then realizes that even though she hasn’t had any contact with Reginald in 22 years, she still has strong feelings for him, and needs to decide if she should follow her mind, or her heart.

Me

I wrote a book. It is listed for sale on www.Amazon.com. There is a travel book listed on Amazon, by a lady named Paula Searcy, but it’s not me….at least, I don’t think it’s me.
It is also listed on www.barnesandnoble.com.
It can also be found on Lulu.com.

There are other books, written by me, for sale on Lulu.

As you can see, I am feeling “some type of way”. SIGH

Please purchase a book that was written by me. Thank you in advance!

paula d searcy, a.k.a Rupert Flagg

I also have a FaceBook Fan page – Paula Rupert Flagg Searcy.

I have approved this shameless ad! giggling!

Learned Contentment

Philippians 4:11~ Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need.…

This past week, the lottery was the largest it’s ever been. I suspect that sometime soon it will again, grow to some other outrageous number and the masses will once again, clamor to get in on it ~ never once understanding that it’s their money ~ their buying in ~ that pushes it up so high.

While I’ve never been a dedicated lottery player, I was addicted to Publisher’s Clearing House and played in an organized fashion for far too many years. Yes, I said, played. It is a game… no purchase needed to win/ be entered and yet… never once, between 1994 and 2001 did i ever remotely won anything. The subscriptions weren’t even free.
We were in deep NEED. I felt divine urging to continue to faithfully send in each mailer on time, writing it on the calendar. It was very sad.

I admit to playing the lottery every so often and I admit to feeling very down when someone wins… I used to search out any info on them to see why God would allow them to win and not me.

Then, just recently did it occur to me why it’s permissible,(1 Cor. 10:23) but not beneficial for me to purchase lottery tickets. It goes against what I say I believe.

Matthew 6:33 ~ …”For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. “But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. “So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

I’ve heard myself say, “Seek first the kingdom…”(Matt. 6:33), but quite honestly not having a full understanding of just what exactly it means. I didn’t study it, nor have I sought godly wisdom on it. It was and still is a foundational building block for me; a way to stay focused on the Father’s love for me.

Then the other day, I was wandering through a variety store. I questioned myself. “Why Paula, are you wandering aimlessly through this store?” I replied to myself, “I’m shopping.” And as if in a conversation with a good, but wise friend, the response was, “Well, you know what shopping really is, right? (I didn’t answer, these questions are statements) “Shopping is wandering around looking for something to spend money on.”Now, while this may not be a profound statement to you, for me it was “could-have-had-a-V8” moment. Shopping is NOT the result of need, it is motivated by want. I’d already picked up what I came in for, .99. But for whatever reason, I was looking to spend more… “HOW CAN I BE TRUSTED WITH MILLIONS WHEN I CAN’T EVEN BE FAITHFUL WITH THE HUNDREDS?”

I paid my $1.07 (.99 + taxes) and walked out pondering the thought.
It lingered in my mind. I’ve always known that this world’s system of things functions on debt. Commercials are there to entertain and create a false “need”. the words: “Sale” “BOGO” “FREE with purchase“,etc. are all designed to get you to part with your $$$$.$$. An we buy into the debt system, often relying on ourselves to be wise enough to know when to say when…. well, I’m your huckleberry. I’ve learned to tune out commercials that entice, except when it concerns groceries and even then I proceed with caution.

Fast forward to a couple of days ago. I was still pondering the whole shopping conversation while watching a bible study. And as if in a conversation with a good, but wise friend, the was whispered to my spirit, “Contentment will keep you out of lack.” I responded, “I have learned to be content.”His response, deep and freeing “Have you?”
I pondered that question. I thought I had, but the discontent in my heart from not winning the lottery (I didn’t even buy a ticket) spoke otherwise. My hubby works hard and diligently. I, in my daughter’s words, “tend to my vines very carefully; Shooing away the little foxes. And like the writer of this portion of scripture. “ I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need.”
It’s just that I haven’t learned the Father’s plan, the Kingdom’s rhyme and reason of what I’d learned of the world’s lack. sigh
Yes, it’s a process. I must learn to say “no” to my flesh. I truly don’t need new furniture… I have children who disrespect the old stuff. sigh…

I am learning to be content, in a Kingdom sort of way. There is blessing in contentment and I believe that it allows the Father to bless us extraordinarily!
Ephesians 3: 14 “….For this cause I bow my knees unto the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, 15 Of whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, 16 That he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man; 17 That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love, 18 May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height; 19 And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God.

20 Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,

21 Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen. (KJV)

Selah

Promises…..

Simple Definition of promise

Popularity: Top 10% of words

  • : a statement telling someone that you will definitely do something or that something will definitely happen in the future

  • : an indication of future success or improvement

  • : a reason to expect that something will happen in the future

pinky swear
An eternally binding act of hooking pinky fingers together in an attempt to seal the deal of a promise that has been made.
Facebook 2016 is proving to be just as “simple” as its always been. I’ve seen posts that cause me laughter. I have even shared those with my friends.
It’s my goal to not spend so much time on Facebook, but I’m not certain that that goal will be attainable for me, because I’m truly not making much effort to stay off of it.There are other posts… preachy ones…(groan); political ones…. very often from friends I like who don’t seem to share my point of view about anything Barack Obama… who in my opinion has been a very good example of leadership. Again, I am entitled to MY opinion. I am subscribed to his twitter feed(I hope it continues after he leaves office)
There are other posts, ones that have prompted this blog. It has to do with the entire idea of promises.
Three of my adult Facebook friends received “Promise Rings”. The relationships are more than a year long. I’ve stared at the posts and then I asked myself, “Why would a man, over the age of 21, give his girlfriend a promise ring? I believe all three relationships are sexual… no judgement… just a belief. (We’re just going to lay here with our clothes on.., which is as silly as “I’m just gonna put the head in…”)
Then I realized that I was a little angry. All three are strong beautiful women, so why would a promise ring be enough to cause them to post it to social media?
In truth, one other woman received a ring for Christmas… she didn’t post it, but showed it to me, with the comments…”He gave me a ring. Jewelry is always nice!” So I asked, “Is it a promise ring?” She shot me a look…”Girl please… what is he promising? Not to piss me off?” We both giggled.
I suppose my anger is because I believe that the other three relationships are all wrong… (don’t even get me started) BUT, neither of them asked my opinion on their relationships. I’m just venting in hopes that someone, somewhere, would grasp what I’m saying…. if after 12 months, 365 days, he isn’t certain he can go all of the way… drop him. Unless that’s all you want. I believe a promise ring states that he’s happy with the way things are, he’s just making a small deposit to keep the “account/legs” open.
I know that the Millionaire Matchmaker says, “No sex, without monogamy.”BUT, I believe that true monogamy only comes with true commitment. BUT then, it’s just my opinion. If you like it, I love it! (er, not truthfully)
I’m trying to raise my daughter/granddaughters with a sense of self worth that would cause them to respect themselves. I want them to believe that sex before marriage is cheating on their eternal husband.

I wish someone had taken the time to tell me just how much sex affects the psyche. (the human soul, mind,and/or spirit).

I don’t know, I believe that a pinky swear would have been a better.

Oops………

I neglected to renew and as a result I was down for more than a month. Giggling
Did you miss me?

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

The kids are great! Hubby is awesomely amazing and Me? I’m evolving!

2016! I remember when I thought 1977 was just too far away to even imagine, let alone 1984 (the book) 🙂

I haven’t made any resolutions. I’m going to seek to make each day, one day at a time, great! Wait, isn’t that a resolution? HAHAHAHA

 

…..Rewarder of those who diligently seek . . . Hebrews 11:6

He that diligently seeks good procures favor: but he that seeks mischief, it shall come unto him. Proverbs 11:27

It was almost instantaneous . . . the feeling of jealous anger I get when I see an author on tv that isn’t me.

It was almost instantaneous . . . that voice in my heart/head that said, “She is diligent and earns her rewards.”

Now, before you jump on my head, consider this, I have written 11 books, can you name at least 2? I didn’t think so… it is for this reason, that I am not diligent about writing/releasing anymore, but words swirl and dance in my head every second of every minute of every hour of every day . . . you get the geest.

Why are we like this? Why am I like this? I haven’t the answers. I just know that the effectual fervent prayer avails much. Yes, I’m rambling. I usually do after such a chastising. I’m just happy my Creator loves me enough to correct me.

Blogging About A Blogger’s Blog

She said she’s going to start a blog to get her thoughts out so that people can hear what she has to say.
I’m not reading it, or searching it out, on purpose BECAUSE she has HORRIBLE grammar and her spelling isn’t much better. In her defense, she writes the way she speaks… sigh, everyone’s an Author.

I’m certain my Editor grimaces at some of my written musings ~ but she gits paid to make me look gudder then mst!

RE: A post from Sept 2010 by Single Dad Laughing

 I didn’t read the entire post as the writer asked I must admit I skipped from page one to page three of the very long post. I am very aware that opinion pieces are just that opinion pieces.

I’m responding in this way because I wondered what was truly going on in the situation between the quote “bad dad” unquote and the son who appeared to be broken. Before I get into that, I want to recall a couple of memories I have from my mommy files:
 First, My son has always been high energy. He’s far better now than he’s every been, but there are still challenges. The incident I want to share happened in a thrift store, with freshly painted/polished floors ~ CONCRETE floors. So I corralled the kids, gave them the lecture (you know the one), put the smallest of them in a cart and placed the hands of the older ones on the cart and off we went. My son began to skip and bounce, which gave me visions of his head against that floor, so I spoke to him, face to face, asked for confirmation of info upload (he nodded) and off we went. Well there must have been a memory dump that I missed because he let go of the cart and began to repeat the unwanted actions. The next few minutes, I reminded, I threatened, I put him in the cart, he cried, begged, I relented and took him out. I saw the looks we were getting, so I decided to cut the trip short. So there we were, standing in line waiting to check out, My son once again lets go of the cart, and seconds later, his head hit the floor, hard! I didn’t move. I looked down, checking his face, assessing the degree of injury, I saw his face register the pain. I saw his memory kick in and I said, “See, I told you that would happen. Now do you understand?” He got up nodding and grabbed my hand. The lady behind me voiced her opinion of my parenting skills (unfavorable) and the lady behind her corrected her stating that she’d heard me telling him he’d fall for the past five minutes. Once we got home, he got an ice pack and snuggles. Did the incident change his outside behavior? Yes.
The next was in an airport with my toddler daughter who stated she needed to go to the bathroom. I sent her with her big sister to the bathroom. This occurred three times in about 15 minutes. On the fourth request from the toddler, my eldest, now very frustrated, said that she wasn’t using the bathroom, she was just going in to play in the water and flush the toilet.  So the next 5, 6, 7th requests went ignored. Upon the 8th request I asked her if she truly had to go potty, she said yes. I said okay, let’s go and reached for her hand. She shook her head and asked for her sister to take her. I said nope, she’d have to go with me or not at all. She climbed into the chair and sat down, so I sat down and began to feed the baby ~ this must have been her Que because she began to jump up and down and yell, “I need to go potty!” I handed the baby to my eldest and stood up. My middle child began to scream louder and not allow me to take her hand, so I sat down (we’re in the airport) and she continued to scream that she had to go to the bathroom. I said calmly, “I will take you, but you’re going to calm down and take my hand.” She stomped her foot and told me no, she wanted to go with her sister. So I made a decision to not carry her kicking and screaming to the bathroom. I sat back and she ran toward the bathroom. My eldest caught her and as she was bringing her back, a lady who’d only been there for about 5 minutes angrily spat out, “Let the girl go to the bathroom before I go get someone about this!” My response to the lady wasn’t nice. I’m not proud. The exchange caused my daughter to sit down and get quiet.

My son has been chastised many times in public and at home. My daughter is now a mom. My son, now 11, isn’t broken. My daughter isn’t broken. While I understand what he thinks he saw 4 years ago, I wish he’d have taken the time to check what was going on. Child welfare checks are easy. People will respond in a way that will show you who they are as parents and people. Children, at their worst are genius Sociopaths only concerned about their needs and wants. So if you see a situation you’re not certain of or if you see more anger than you feel is necessary, say something. There is a point in which discipline becomes abuse, everyone’s line is in a different place. Each child is different and therefore requires different levels of everything. ABUSE IS NEVER DISCIPLINE!

Sigh … I’ve spoken to many an angry parent and for the most part felt the anger subside. Just don’t be so quick to judge without all of the facts. Do not be afraid to tell someone if you believe a child is being abused.
I saw a toddler verbally abusing his mother, she was quietly admonishing him with kind words, calling him sweetie and such. A man the boy called Grampa walked over and pinched the boy on the leg while saying something in the boy’s ear. I saw pain register on the boy’s face. I saw him nod. The older man kept talking. A lady walked past, summed up what she thought was going on and began to make loud statements, which is her right, I suppose to assess the situation. This brought the mom back to the cart. She placed herself between the boy and the older man. She looked from the lady to me and tried to smile. I said, “That’s a good Grampa.” She smiled and walked away.

Point of view is everything! “Only believe half of what you see, some or none of what you hear.”

Here is the post to which I’m responding: SDL . I am reminded of my mother, who used to discipline other people’s children. She once grabbed a little boy for cursing at his mother in a McDonald’s Restaurant. No one ever stopped her or called the police. I don’t think it would work in today’s society.
I’m off my soapbox. No intent to offend. Rude and nasty comments will be deleted.

Certified Couch Avocado

I watch a LOT of television. So much so I have deemed myself a “Certified Couch Avocado “. Avocados are far healthier than potatoes. Enough said.

My favorite new show this season is “Stalker“. I enjoy the originality of it. And to date, I am a couple of episodes behind, my eyes haven’t been assaulted by graphic sex scenes. I am pleasantly surprised by the hunt for ratings through talent and good writing.(This has been canceled)

Now, sadly, there are shows in Shondaland that have caught my eyes also, most recently “How To Get Away With Murder“. I am an on again, off again “Grey’s Anatomy” fan and I must say that the recent turn of events caused me to smile… no spoilers here. There is SEX is Shondaland… LOTS of it. EVERYWHERE … I set the DVR and watch it when the kids are outside or asleep. I have never watched “Scandal“. It just never appealed to me.
Yes “Blacklist” in on my list. Red is the man!

Well, just so you know… I found this post in the draft folder. I no longer watch “HTGAWM”, or “GA”.
Netflix has become my new friend. It’s better than ON DEMAND because I don’t like commercials.

Any-who, I do still watch television… nothing considered “wholesome” in the line-up. “Survivor’s Remorse” “Being Mary Jane” “The Mysteries of Laura” “Mom” and of course there are those I watch almost grudgingly, though I’m not certain why: “Empire” is first on this list. I don’t happen to think Jussie/Jamal can sing. It’s like a bad Michael impression. I am, I must admit, in deep like with the entire Cookie/Lucious dynamic. I know it’s because of “Hustle & Flow“. It’s like the movie was continued and we see that he made it even after being jacked for his music. Shug and Djay made it y’all! I don’t watch this in real time… On Demand works, I can mute Jamal/commercials. Second on this list is: “Law and Order: Special Victims Unit” I sometimes set the DVR for this one… but more often than not, I just watch on demand. The new batch of detectives are “soft and whiny”.

 

Well, enough of that…. Red is still the man!