We all have firsts. Only one person is first.
I’d wasted my virginity long before I got to Mr. PADGETT, you know, sexual wampum is very real. And I’d squandered the riches of the kingdom in such a way that I can’t even remember when it began… ok I can but that takes me back to things I don’t want to remember right now. I must insert that I do not count rape as wampum… that is stolen treasures. I mention it only because it crossed my mind as I was writing.
I can’t even tell you the number Mr. PADGETT held, I can however remember that he was the first to elicit the ultimate response from my nubile body. I remember that it caused the lighting in the room to change and like any drug addiction, it caused me to want to recreate that high. It was all I could think about until I coaxed him into bed again. I must clarify here that in his words, I’d lied to him about the status of my virginity. He didn’t want to be my first anything, so when he was almost naked the second time, he stopped and uttered the words that followed me for longer than you’d imagine, “I’m not trying to fall in love.” Sigh
Heck, neither was I! I just wanted the high and at that moment he was the drug dealer. I did not get high that night or for many, many nights after the first night.
I’ve always imagined what it would have been like if I’d waited until marriage. What could it have been if someone had simply told me that waiting to have sexual intercourse would have saved my now damaged everything. Yes, as a Christian we are taught to wait till marriage because sex outside of marriage is sin, however, it goes so much deeper than any of that can explain.
There are no emotions attached when trading wampum. It is a transaction brokered by an app nowadays and by any night club back then or if you’re really adventurous, any grocery store. I can say that my first night with Mr. PADGETT started out wampum, seeking the prize in a competition and he was the prize.
SIGH, I won nothing but an understanding of what the phrase, “Do not wake love before its time” means. Don’t misunderstand, sex is not love; though it can be the physical expression of it. Double sigh, how precious it would have been to be forever bound to Mr. PADGETT, if I’d loved him. Nope, he was a prize, a conquest, no love involved. Smh
Apologies for such a long post. Be honest with your teens, sex isn’t love and wampum is a waste. It is a gateway drug. It opens the door to … just be honest with your kids.